To help men date well, I surveyed several women and got their opinion on things that their (current or previous) boyfriend/fiancé/husband did well in their relationships. They shared their tips with me, knowing that I was going to pass them on (anonymously) to men that might be interested.
I asked them to be specific whenever possible – it isn’t immensely helpful to hear “men should lead well”. That seems too vague. What does “leading well” look like, specifically? Practically. I wanted ideas of what could do. Advice on how to make the theoretical and put it into practice.
Here is the fifth part of their tips for when “in a relationship”. Enjoy!
- He started attending church with me right away. That gave us a spiritual influence in our relationship.
- He didn’t expect me to change everything in my life as soon as we were dating. He didn’t complain about me keeping the commitments I had already made before we were dating (church, ministry, family, work). As we got more serious, we started making decisions together.
- When I said I wanted to “take it slow”, he didn’t whine or get angry. He asked me to define what I meant by that – how much time together, physical contact, going public, etc.
- Any time I brought up an issue to discuss, he was always willing to talk about it. Occasionally, he did ask if we could talk about it at another time if he needed to think about the topic first. But he always got back to me
- I think what helped in our dating relationship was he listened to me. We had a lot of conversation that helped me really understand him. After awhile he opened up and wasn’t afraid of being vulnerable. He is very romantic and could share his heart, but only after we got to know each other and our friends. Relationships are dynamic. If the man takes the responsibility to keep appropriate boundaries it shows respect and strong character. I highly recommend the book “Boundaries in Dating”.