2 years ago, Mr. Jeffrey Michael M asked Miss Jayme Lynn H out on a date. I couldn’t believe it. I was ecstatic!
Today, my name isn’t Jayme H anymore. It’s Jayme M. I can hardly believe it. I am still ecstatic!
Here’s the story of our first date:
In one of the conversations that Jeff and I casually had before we were dating, I shared a frustrated that women have sometimes with men and dating. Sometimes, men ask women out on a date, but don’t always make it clear that it’s a date. They probably do this for a variety of reasons – they don’t know to be clear or they think they’re being clear or it seems less risky to just ask to “hang out sometime”. But, women love it when men are clear in asking them out. When men say: “Will you go on a date with me?”, women love it. Even if they answer no, they always appreciate the clarity.
On November 22, 2008, Jeff called me and told me that a group of friends were getting together to play board games. Jeff hadn’t ever called me for that reason, but it wasn’t totally weird because we’ve definitely played games in a group before. I went over to our friend’s house. At one point, someone asked what everyone was doing that evening. I said I had no plans. Towards the end of the afternoon, the group broke up and people started going their separate ways. In order to kind of hang back, I went to use the restroom. (I didn’t really need to use the restroom – I just wanted to create an opportunity!) When I came back downstairs, Jeff was still there (as I was hoping he would be!)
We started talking and I had the feeling that he was going to ask me on a date. He started to – “Since you don’t have any plans tonight…” when we were interrupted by a friend! The friend had just seen a family of deer (quite common down by the river) and wanted to tell us about it. We listened to his story – I think I was outwardly polite, but inwardly I was telling him – “Just go away”! Eventually, that friend left (it really wasn’t any longer than a few minutes, but it seemed like an eternity to me). Jeff then was able to finish his sentence. “Since you don’t have any plans tonight, would you like to go to dinner with me on a date?” “Yes, I would love to.” Smiles from both of us! That was about 4:30 in the afternoon. Jeff and I made plans for him to pick me up at 5:30 – in just an hour!
I drove home (I’m pretty sure I broke a speed limit or two on the way home.) Then the internal debate started. “Should I change my clothes? I’m wearing jeans and a sweater. He had just seen me an hour ago. If I changed, he’d know…and what would that say about me? If I don’t change, what does that say about how I feel about the date?” On my way home, I called my roommate, Melissa — I told her my good news. I also called 2 friends of ours (Angie and Chad) who were driving to an event they had. Apparently, Chad already knew that Jeff had asked me out – Jeff just got done telling him! Angie thought he had asked me out earlier in the day and I was just being secretive earlier when I said I had no plans for that evening. I wasn’t being secretive, but was being hopeful!
I got home and decided against changing my outfit. Maybe I should have – I don’t know enough about these things. Since I didn’t really have much to do at home, I just sat in the kitchen watching TV waiting for him to come. I was so nervous. I’m pretty sure that if I would’ve had a week of waiting, I would’ve canceled on him. Not because I would’ve wanted to, but because I wouldn’t have been able to take that level of nervousness! I’m sure my system would’ve crashed.
The man is always on time and sure enough, at 5:30 p.m. on the dot, Jeff rang the door bell. Even though I knew it was coming, I jumped a little bit – the loudness of the bell startled me. I went to the door, purse in hand and opened it. He smiled when I opened the door. I smiled when I saw him. “Hi.” “Hi.”
He walked me to his car door and opened the door for me. Once in the car, we started to talk about plans. He had a restaurant in mind (Rick’s Boatyard) and a coffeehouse (13th Street Coffee). A date perfectly planned all with an hour’s notice! I remember where we sat in the restaurant (we on accident got the same table when we back a few months later for Valentine’s Day!) and what each of us were wearing. I was in a pink and white sweater my sister had handed down to me. He was in his blue and white plaid long sleeve shirt.
Afterwards, we took a walk to the Pedestrian Bridge that’s right next door to Rick’s Boatyard. By then the sun had gone down, turning the night pretty cold! I was too cool to have brought my coat with me on the date, so I wrapped up in a blanket that was in his car trunk as we walked up to the bridge. After that, we went to 13th Street Coffee. Might be an odd choice for 2 non-coffee drinkers, but we each had a nice hot cup of apple cider – a favorite of both of ours. We talked more, before calling it an evening. I don’t remember anything specific that we talked about that night. Just generic stuff, I guess. We had had many conversations before this about our faith, work, hobbies and family that we didn’t have to do the typical first date stuff – “So, you have parents, right?” or “You have a job, yes?” or “How do you feel about Jesus?” That stuff we already knew!
At some point in our relationship up to that point, Jeff learned that I hadn’t ever seen “It’s a Wonderful Life”. I don’t know how I’ve missed it in all these years, but I had. On the way to take me home, Jeff asked me for a second date (yes, he used the word date!) where we could watch “It’s A Wonderful Life”. I, of course, agreed to a second date. It wouldn’t much matter to me what we did – a second date with Jeff Massman was definitely not something I was going to turn down! Thanksgiving was the week after our first date, so our second date waited a couple of weeks until we were both in town. But I did get my second date with Jeff and we did watch “It’s a Wonderful Life”. And now we’re living that wonderful life together.
My last first date. And the best first date of my life!
(Snapshots of Rick’s Boatyard and the Pedestrian Bridge)
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